What Does JD Vance mean to Cat-Corner Women?

What Does JD Vance mean to Cat-Corner Women?

ByHarsimran Kaur

August 4, 2024

I usually go by the ingenious claim of ‘curiosity killed the cat’! But, the cack-handed lampoon by JD Vance, the 39 year old Ohio Senator picked by Trump, has made ‘cats’ an infra dig commodity. Was it a trick to make them feel chastened? So, what if the cadence of their ‘meow’ is a soothing gaiety for the hag-ridden eccentricities or the ‘childless’ cat-ladies; or did he mean ‘child-like’?? All this blows revanchist obscurantism in the ‘Republican’ prelude to the United States Elections 2024. 

Owing a pet should least sound like an ‘inflammatory deride’, and what women do with their amorphous life should be best left to the Gods—maybe the divine feels that ‘cats’ or perhaps any pet will be a coup de Coeur! In the entire desultory, Vance pressed his own foot; was it to make ‘Kamala Harris’ feel like a clanger for not sailing the ‘motherhood ride’? It definitely turned out as a cookie cutter! A clarion call to Mr. Vance—kindly make ‘equality of gender role’ a coloratura in the legislative proposal in case the trump-hant heavens fall on you. 

There are other issues that the ‘female fighters’ would like you to divulge in. If marriage, according to you is a de rigueur, then why the caterwaul of ‘divorce’ reads otherwise? As per the recent statistics of the Center for Disease Prevention and Control (CDC) in United States,

“The current divorce rate nationwide is around 42%. One trend on the rise is ‘Gray Divorce’, where couples over the age of 50 end their marriages”.

Maybe that’s the reason, I guess, women prefer to keep cats to not be cornered by the merciless pirouette of destiny. If marriage and having kids is the only proviso to feel liberated then I have no compunction to say ‘freedom comes at an expense’. Or maybe, it is discreet to ask your wife Usha Chilukuri, an acclaimed lawyer and a mother of 3 kids,

‘What has the amount of juice to do with a ripe or unripe lemon as long as the persistency of its culture to be squeezed is maintained’? 

To go back to his statement on pro-motherhood and pro-marriage in a 2022 tweet,

“If your world view tells you that it’s bad for women to become mothers but liberating for them to work 90 hours a week in a cubicle at NYT or Goldman Sachs, you have been had”.

If it’s about being cheated, what kind of poweress are we expecting from vice-prez nominee JD Vance?

  • Ban cats as pets so that single women are doomed in distress.
  • What would ‘women liberation’ look like? A dead-duck dawdling in the hope to find a perfect simulacrum of ‘marriage marionette’ finally settling as a mare ‘nest.
  • The ‘trad wife’ fad may find a leap; the inglorious task of a woman so steadily engrossed in cleaning up the porcelain pots and tiding the dust will find subservience in the felicity to bring up a home to perfection.
  • ‘Miserable’ will have a new definition—‘let me find my honor; I am stripped off my cattery.’

Enough of the delusional cats Mr. Vance! I would also like to hear your thoughts on immigration rules; hope Mrs. Vance is not guided by the sine qua non considering she belongs to immigrant parents. The streets choc-o-bloc with Americans waiting to hear your aspirations are already feeling the nudge by the ‘Tawdry Trump Tautology’ that finds “Harris’ as an executioner of babies. Is this a denouncement to the ‘Roe vs. Wade’ decision overruled by the Supreme Court June 2022? Are republicans ready for a coup de maître?

All this reminds me of the symbolic storyline of the ‘Lion & the Mouse’—the part where the Lion is trapped in the net, soporific in his own testimonies. Often, one gets caught in its own web of priggishness to be later rescued by the sentience of the ‘other’ who is usually stymied. A wakeup call for the nasty bumptious ‘Trump’ to call ‘Harris’ a bum; if that’s not a bummer to make the feminist jump off their foot, then very well sew a web of the Trump-Vance schadenfreude.

The cat is out of the bag now! Vance—let’s stop kidding and let the ‘childless ladies’ be away from the belligerent echoes. You follow suit to the last bearded man—the elected President of United States in 1888 Benjamin Harrison. He let ‘Sanger’ occupy as the first female White House staffer on 1890.

Hope the beard flows long enough to liberate the orthodoxy!!

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